Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Dear Car and Driver,

Thank you for sending me your generous offer to renew my subscription at a discount.

As you may know, I have been a subscriber for about twenty five years.

Before that, I read my father's subscription for more than ten years as a kid.

Unfortunately, I can not allow my son to read your magazine due to your unfortunate substitution of vulgarity and sophomoric sexual "humor" for what used to be fun, creative and skillful prose.

From this month's issue, Frank Kafka's Garage:

Reader question: What the hell does "engine NVH mean?...

Car and Driver: 1) No Virgins Here...

Reader question: How is dry-sump lubrication different from the method...

Car and Driver: A "dry hump" usually involves two clueless teenagers...oh, oh, I'm sorry you said dry sump!

One other thing. It still isn't okay to use the F-word in a mainstream magazine despite it's increased appearance in say Fortune magazine (also cancelled) and others.

Your "Mother FR 500" (Mustang) cover (in big block letters) from a few months back was ill conceived and drew sharp criticism from some of your readers, some of which notified you of their cancelled subscriptions.

This may explain why you have to resort to accepting advertising revenue from the makers of male enhancement products, pheromones and sex couches.

The final straw was a couple of issues ago (May 2007) "On the Road to Baghdad" where you essentially dishonored our soldiers in a weak play on words.

I think one of your reader's recent letters sums it up best:

Oh, I get it! Baghdad, Arizona-not that other place where people are suffering death, torture, lack of living necessities, general dismemberment, and other humorous personal events. What a thigh slapper! I guess I should be happy there wasn't an Auschwitz, New Mexico.

Stick to cars. You used to be pretty good at that.

Sadly, I will not be renewing my subscription. I used to be excited to see my new Car and Driver on the kitchen counter when it would arrive. Nowadays, they have started piling up.

Thanks for the memories.

1 comment:

Jeff Kouba said...

I get Truck Trend magazine. So far they've been good that way. Hopefully they stay that way.